Day 8 on Lupron | November 17th

I went to the doctor today (nothing pertaining to Lupron).  When he came in the room, asked how I was doing...wondering about the Lupron side effects.  (He was very aware of my being scared to go on it, and the fact that I was mortified of getting depression again).  I told him how COMPLETELY surprised I was at how well I was doing, and that I had no signs of depression yet.  He was happy to hear it.  He then said, ‘You seem very relaxed’.  I was shocked that he noticed that.  I have been feeling relaxed and just not as anxious as normal.  Normally, when my kids do things that upset me, I’ll yell at them.  But, lately, I noticed that I just don’t have the urge to yell at them over everything.  I don’t feel upset very often.  I told him this, and also told him that I was surprised he noticed that….that I didn’t know it was noticeable to others.  He told me that usually when I’m there I’m on edge.  I started laughing and embarrassed, I disagreed with him.  He said, ‘Yeah, you are’.  I was pretty embarrassed that even the doctor could see the difference!  I guess my family must really be able to see it.  He was quite dumbfounded as to how my body seems to be reacting in a good way to having my estrogen turned off.  I suggested that after this is over we look at my hormone levels again.  (I did so just a month or so before I got pregnant this last time.  The levels were all in the normal range.)  He reminded me of the normality of my hormone levels and said that we could look at some different options, but that we can’t just leave my estrogen turned off long-term.  He laughed and told me that maybe menopause will be something I can look forward to.  He said something to the effect that my body is reacting badly to having normal hormones.  So weird.  I didn’t ask what the options were that we would look at in the future….I’ll just wait and see when the time comes.